We can Learn a Lot from Our Dogs

It is sometimes said that the best therapists are furry and have four legs. I would add that I think our dogs make pretty darn good teachers as well.

Yes, you read that right. It’s true WE teach our dogs a lot – how to sit, shake hands, heel, and so on. With the proper training, some dogs even become guard dogs, service dogs, and seeing-eye dogs. But I think it quite possible, even likely, that they actually teach us even more.

The reason I say this is because our Maltese, Baxter, passed recently, and I have been thinking not only about what he meant to us, but what we learned from him. Consider:

* Dogs teach us how to live life one day at a time. I thought for sure we would have Baxter at least a few more years, but what do I know? Earlier this month, he suddenly became gravely ill, and it was clear he was suffering. I was not ready to say goodbye to our four-legged best friend, and yet my wife convinced me that we had to. His passing reminded me just how fleeting life really is, and how this is true for not only people, but especially our pets, who only live a fraction as long as we do.

Resources for those grieving the loss of a pet:

Love is a Dog             https://www.facebook.com/groups/1782075482106035/

Rainbow Bridge ……..  http://www.rainbowbridge.com/

Besides, ever known a dog that didn’t know how to enjoy each day? On many a stressful day at my computer, I would look down and see Baxter looking at me, probably eager for a treat, and I would think to myself, “With love like that, how bad can it really get?”

* Dogs teach us loyalty. Ever known an animal more loyal than a dog? Baxter would follow me from room to room to room throughout the day. Whatever I was doing, wherever I was, that was where he wanted to be. Sometimes, I would swear he was too “zonked out” (sleeping) to notice I was out of the room. Nope! I’d be in the bathroom…next thing I knew… there would be Baxter lurking into the room to see where I was!

* Dogs teach us unconditional love. We humans certainly know how to love pretty well on our own, but it is easier said than done to love as unconditionally as our four-legged friends. Dictionary.com defines unconditional as, “absolute, complete, and unqualified.” Consider prenuptial agreements as but one example. “I will love you if….” Love, but with strings attached. But there is no such thing for dogs…They don’t care what we do, or how much money we make. They love us. Period.

Here are some of the other things that dogs teach us:

1) Let someone scratch behind your ear or rub your belly once in a while – it feels good!

2) Stick your head out a window and let the wind rush past your face – that feels good, too!

3) There’s no such thing as too much of a good thing! See #1 and #2.

4) “To the world, we might be one person, but to one person – or a pet – we might be the world.” – Anon.

5) “Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.” – Anon.

It is said that God brings pets into our lives to show us how to love, and they leave to teach us about loss.

RIP Baxter – you taught us a lot.

CAPTIONS: Dogs certainly don’t teach us anything about computers! (photo above left), but they sure teach us a lot of other things. One thing dogs are good at (and even people) is napping – Baxter and I nodding off (above right). Baxter and I getting ready for Halloween (above left).

Ghost Writer / Blogger for Hire!

Boy, I’d sure like to write a blog, but I don’t have the time!

Are you a busy employee assistance or other workplace professional who has ever said something like that to yourself?

Did you know that a blog is one of the best ways to enhance awareness of your services? Did you also know that someone can write them for you anonymously? (Known in journalism circles as “ghost writers.”)

If you would like to start a blog to enhance awareness of your services but can’t find the time, email me at

madjac@tds.net.

 

B-eing a Type B is A-OK

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Talent Smart, Travis Bradberry, www.talentsmart.com

Travis Bradberry, an award-winning author, and co-founder of TalentSmart, had a very interesting post on LinkedIn recently about how people with Type B personalities can be overlooked in the working world. As someone who used to work with a LOT of Type As in the workplace, I wanted to present a few thoughts about some of the differences in our qualities.

Let me start by clarifying that I don’t think there is anything wrong with being a Type A. I think every organization needs a few Type As – they are outspoken in many cases, true; but they are also the go-getters that know how to do what needs to be done. Give them a job, they will get it done. They are clear about how to go about a given task, where others would likely be more indecisive. That’s the good part.

But I have also learned that if you put TOO MANY Type As in a particular work setting, the result is often managers and supervisors involved in heated battles because one of them wants to be IN CHARGE. Put another way, you may need a hard-driving Type A personality to take command in important situations… but MORE than one? Probably not a good idea – they will inevitably lock horns.

So long as we have the same destination plugged into our GPS, what difference does it make if you’re going 80 on the freeway, and I’m going 60 on an off-road (like the one in the picture above)?

Where does Type B fit in? People with Type B personalities like myself are often content in the background. But just because we tend to shun the spotlight doesn’t mean we don’t care – we’re just more laid back about it. Dr. Bradberry correctly points out that being laid-back is not the same thing as being disengaged or indifferent!

Reading Dr. Bradberry’s post was very enlightening. It made me feel much better about who I am, because for years, surrounded by Type As – who seemed to dominate the newsrooms I was employed in for years — I felt like a second-class citizen compared to these powerful personalities. It was as if I lacked ambition.

Bradberry has this to say about Type As: “We’re awed by your drive and by your breathtaking pace. we recognize the rewards that come your way, and we’re impressed. But we’re wise enough to know that we’re not wired that way.”

Indeed. It takes all types to make a workplace effective. We Type Bs are happy to stay in the slow lane and let you pass. So long as we have the same destination plugged into our GPS, what difference does it make if you’re going 80 on the freeway, and I’m going 60 on an off-road (like the one in this picture)?

 

 

Mark Your Calendar! Free Webinar on Workplace Bullying

Workplace bullying is systematic psychological abuse aimed at degrading and humiliating others. Research from around the world indicates up to 50% of working adults report that they have been bullied.

Although OSHA and various state and federal regulations require that employers provide a safe and harassment-free work environment, it is an epidemic many employers are ill-equipped to deal with.

Employee Assistance Report and Civility Partners will present the free webinar, “How to Spot, Understand, and Solve Workplace Bullying” on Wednesday, July 20.

The presentation will be led by Catherine Mattice, MA, SPHR, SHRM-SCP, internationally recognized expert on workplace bullying, and head of Civility Partners, and Mike Jacquart, BA, editor of the Employee Assistance Report monthly newsletter.

Join Catherine and Mike as they define workplace bullying and offer tips for helping targets and organizations solve the problem. All information is based on their own experiences and academic research.

For more info and to register visit

https://civilitypartners.lpages.co/eap-webinar-registration-page/

 

Stroll More Than Scroll: Pros & Cons of Technology

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pros and cons of technology, smart phones

This is the first in a series of posts about the pros and cons of today’s technologically driven age.

Technology can be a great thing in many ways. We can “google” something in the blink of an eye, and have access to information that would have taken minutes, even hours, to research in a library decades ago. I remember looking up books for college term papers, and it was not uncommon to scour through and check out multiple books just to piece together enough information for a single topic. Time consuming!

Technology also drives communication like never before. We can talk to, listen to, and even see people anytime, anywhere on our smart phones. It still blows my mind that someone could be in Boise and receive a text from a business colleague in Shanghai.

It’s ironic that in a day and age with more ‘communication’ than ever before, there is conversely less ‘interaction’ than ever.

Or what’s much more typical for me, you are multi-tasking at your desk when up pops a note from “Bob” reminding you about tomorrow’s 1 p.m. meeting about the new website. Better yet, the reminder could have come up on your smart phone while you were en route to a 30-minute meeting with a client – away from your desk, you might have easily forgotten about it!

These are among the significant advances to life in the 21^st century and THEY ARE great developments in many ways!

But I think it’s also necessary to examine some of the drawbacks – first and foremost among them pertains to communication. It’s ironic that in a day and age with more “communication” than ever before, there is conversely less “interaction” than ever.

Consider: When you “press the flesh,” you get to meet a peer in your field, even get to actually “know” this person … especially over time when you see some of the same people at some of the same meetings and other events. You are able to build relationships by engaging in important face-to-face networking … as well as the professional development you’re able to gain by attending conferences and other trainings. But you can only do this in person, not online.

It’s disturbing to me that you can go to a conference in today’s day and age and find scores of people more interested in keeping their head down, scrolling through their screens, than they are in getting up, strolling around the premises, looking for potential opportunities for people to meet. What kind of interpersonal skills will tomorrow’s business leaders have? Or maybe NOT have.

I would rather stroll than scroll … but that’s me. What about you?

And what about that time-consuming research at the library? I am still trying to figure out how that was better than Google! Maybe in some cases, there really isn’t any drawback to a technological advancement. But my guess is, that is rare.

More on pros and cons of technology another time.

The Invisible Barrier

“Mental illness is nothing to be ashamed of, but stigma and bias shame us all.” – Bill Clinton

May is Mental Health Awareness Month

Many disabilities are readily apparent. There’s no question that an individual who is blind requires the use of a cane or service animal to get around or that a person unable to walk will need a wheelchair or motor scooter. However, other disabilities aren’t as obvious. Mental health impairments are among the most “invisible” and least understood disabilities, even though they are also among the most common.

People wouldn’t leave a broken arm or a sprained ankle unattended, so why do some folks feel (men especially) that mental health is something they can just ‘tough out’?!

According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), approximately 58 million Americans, or one in four adults, experience a mental health impairment in a given year. NAMI defines a mental health impairment as, “a medical condition that disrupts a person’s thinking, feeling, mood, ability to relate to others, and daily functioning.”

I can count myself among these Americans. During a rough period in my life in which I was out of work for nearly a year, I was finally diagnosed with depression and Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) in spring 2002. I wish I had done so earlier, but then again who knew? For years I just thought that’s who I was and had to live with it… even though I grew increasingly envious of people who laughed and enjoyed life while I struggled to even smile. I knew being out of work was “part of it”, I mean, how many people are happy and bubbly when they’re unemployed? Still, who doesn’t have some peaks and valleys in their lives? And yet, most people seem to “bounce back” from problems quite well. Not me.

I began to realize there was more to what was going on than just being “out of work.” They say that most of us going through a major life issue grow “sick and tired, of being sick and tired,” and so I sought the assistance of my wife’s EAP, which eventually resulted in my diagnosis. What a revelation! It went a LONG way toward explaining why I was having so many work-related problems; issues that crossed over into my personal life as well. I’ll never forget how I felt when I started my medication…it was as if a veil had been lifted from my eyes. “So this is how I’m SUPPOSED to feel!” I thought. “No wonder other people are happier and enjoy life more!”

I encourage ANYONE who even suspects something might be amiss with themselves mentally (or someone they know for that matter)  to get checked out! It is a tremendous shame that bias and stigma remain barriers to mental health that need to be overcome – barriers that are at the heart of what Mental Health Month is all about. (This important observance is noted in the month of May.)

People wouldn’t leave a broken arm or a sprained ankle unattended, so why do some folks feel (men especially) that mental health is something they can just “tough out”?!  You can no more resolve depression or other disorders than you could that untreated arm or ankle! Mental health IS health!  And in this day and age, help is just a mouse click away.

Mental Health America (www.mentalhealthamerica.net) offers a tool-kit that includes fact sheets, a poster, calendar of mental health tips, materials to use with the media and on social media, and more.

Other resources include:

National Alliance on Mental Illness — http://www.nami.org

Carson J Spencer Foundation – http://www.carsonjspencer.org

MentalHealth.gov –  http://www.mentalhealth.gov

Note: This article was originally posted in 2015 and is being re-posted due to it being Mental Health Awareness Month.

 

Great Things Come in Small Packages: 2017 Wisconsin EAPA Conference

MILWAUKEE, Wis. – It’s said that great things come in small packages, and that was definitely the case at the Greater Wisconsin EAPA Chapter’s 28^th Annual Conference on Employee Assistance, held April 27-28 at the Best Western Airport Hotel & Convention Center in Milwaukee. There were more than 100 attendees (up from last year), but the keynotes and breakout sessions, in my opinion, were as good as larger conferences in the EA field.

Below are a few of the highlights:

DAY ONE – Sex, Drugs and Rock N’ Roll: The Biology of Addiction was the topic of the opening keynote, presented by David Mays, MD, PhD, University of Wisconsin-Madison. Mays explained how human biology mediates our addictions and why addictive behavior is so puzzling and difficult to manage.

It All Starts with Food was led by Retired Col. Frank Alvarez, CEO of Frankly Nutritious. “If components are missing and/or of inferior quality, think the Three Little Pigs here, you will not reach your potential in all areas of your life,” said Alvarez. “The fix is simple and easy; nutrition.”

Stephanie Bellin, a wellness trainer with ThedaCare at Work, presented Reasonable Suspicion. “The training [also] gives you skills and tools needed to handle a situation in which an employee might be under the influence of drugs or alcohol,” she said.

Raising Awareness of Your EAP was presented by Michael Jacquart, editor, writer, and communications strategist. “What is an EAP? What does an EAP do? These questions are asked much too often, at least partly due to EAPs not doing enough to market themselves and their services,” he stated.

Legal Considerations for Employee Assistance Professionals was led by Carrie Joshi and Robin Sheridan, attorneys with the law firm Hall, Render, Kilian, Heath & Lyman, P.C. Areas they discussed included leaves of absence, accommodation obligations for disabled employees, acting as an employer consultant, confidentiality (including exceptions) and telehealth. “Second opinions are allowed under the FMLA, but employers should not be asking you for it,” Sheridan said.

DAY TWO – Leading an Intentional Culture was the topic of the keynote, presented by Lee Bouche, CEAP and president of Bouche Consulting, LLC. Workplace culture is more than a written statement of mission and values hung on the wall for employees to see, according to Bouche. “It is living and evolving within the organization and needs to be intentionally led to achieve desired organizational results.”

Michael Goldman, CEAP, Goldman Training and Consultation, led Helping EAPs Advocate for Employees who are on the Autism Spectrum Disorder. Among other areas, Goldman presented case studies, suggestions for supporting individuals with ASD, the EAP’s role to employers, and examples of organizations that embrace inclusion.

Many thanks for the great job by the conference committee: Chuck Austin, We Energies; Kelly Nies, ThedaCare at Work; Nancy Lynn Smith, Magellan Healthcare; and Lori Wessel, Holy Family Memorial EAP. ….. NOTE: The pictures in this post are NOT from this conference.

Time is Running Out!

As a busy employee assistance or other behavioral health specialist, you are well aware that each workday just goes by too fast! You know all too well that in today’s society in which there are so many things competing for our time and attention, that it’s important to elevate awareness of your EAP or other practice.

But you don’t have the time! What projects do you NOT get done due to lack of time? I can help! Maybe you’d like to increase your social media presence but can’t find the time to write a blog. I can ghostwrite one for you on a regular basis.

What about writing news releases that “should” go out a regular basis but end up being more like “once in a while” because you don’t have the time to keep up with them since you’re a “one-man band.”

Whatever it is, don’t keep putting off the projects that are hindering growth of your EAP.  You’ll be able to finally check some of those tasks off your hectic to-do list. Contact me: madjac@tds.net